The reasonable letter we finally received after PR flack sam singer screamed obscenities at us for five full minutes
Patricia Lynn Henley's article ("Grove to Go?" April 8) was very unfair to the Bohemian Club and mischaracterized our application for a timber-management permit in Sonoma County. We regret that your reporter never contacted us for comment prior to the publication of this article or allowed us the courtesy to respond to misinformation provided by several sources.
For the record, our proposed timber plan prohibits the harvesting of old-growth trees. And while we hope our plan will be approved by the California Department of Forestry, it is not a "foregone conclusion." We have worked diligently with Cal-Fire, the state Department of Fish and Game and other regulatory agencies to craft a plan that balances environmental considerations with the need to lessen the real risk of a catastrophic fire that threatens our property and surrounding communities.
Finally, we wish to refute the assertion listed at the end of Ms. Henley's article that the Club is somehow financially motivated in pursuing a timber-management plan. With some 25,000 dead trees in our forest, we are seeking to implement this plan to protect human life and property and restore the Bohemian Grove to more of its pre-settlement condition. Any and all proceeds from timber harvesting will go back into the maintenance of our forest where, since 2005, we have planted 75,000 new redwood and Douglas fir trees.
President, the Bohemian Club
Patricia Lynn Henley responds: The story was based on comments made at the March 30 administrative hearing by representatives of the Bohemian Club and by opponents to the revised NTMP, not a series of separate interviews. One of the many controversies is whether the plan truly protects all old growth redwoods on the club's property, or if the club is not acknowledging areas outside the encampment that should be protected.
April fools' continues
Apologies for the late reply to your thrilling note on the rebirthing center at COPIA ("Rebirthing COPIA," Cal Lede, April 1). Although Robert Mondavi did many public acts, he really was very shy and his greatest gifts are only known to a few. I happen to be the principal holder of the Robert Mondavi Semen Fund and have 70 kilos of his semen frozen in our safe at the bank. We will make this available to your organization and hopefully his dream of filling the Napa Valley with millions of little Roberts will come true.
P.S.: Ours is the Semen Exchange Bank on Fourth Street in Santa Rosa.
In regards to sado-botany ("Eat Your Greens," April 8), I was rather surprised to see nettles classed as a non-native plant. Stinging nettles are native to North America. Some botanists classify nettles into several subspecies—some native to Eurasia, some to North America.
I come from an Oregon tribe, and we as well as other Pacific Northwest tribes regard nettles as a native plant. Some tribes used it to make a fiber; some ate it. My tribe, the Coos, called it walaqas and used it as a medicine for rheumatism.
Three in one blow
The Bohemian agenda sucks—pandering to the empty agribusiness industry and yuppie restaurant owners (boorrrrring). But oh, wait! If we want a treat, then we have to wait for Gabe Meline's adolescent and nepotistic reportage of his little indie band friends—duh. That makes me want to waste the time and energy to read your rag—not.
Regarding the Letters to the Editor for last week (April 8) and your inclusion of a letter from Justine Ashton, I'd say that the two of you would make good bedfellows: a couple of mean-spirited, shrill women.
Take this to heart.
Channeling Sam: Hey, Gary, you suck.